Its time for Bitching Thursday!

Feeling kind of stress just only two days into my work. Just can't help feeling disappointed with the Empire and a stench of regret putting my fate by shading YES. Shouldn't blame myself or the higher being above me for I took a step back and observe not only am I the only one in agony but the couple of my seniors who had never got their deserved rewards.

Yet again I can't help thinking that all this years of contribution and initiative boils down to a Wednesday inconvinient truth that thou desired might not materialize. Power hungry??? No I'm not. A serious imbalance of rewards and punishment across the Empire? I damn agree... Some say its the right place at the right time which threaten to tear apart my notion that genuine hardwork and initiative is all it takes to be there.

I can only felt very damn fucking demoralize with how situation seems to be unfolding so far. I think I will keep a pessimistic perspective about this whole issue from today onwards.

Well, shit do happen up the career ladder that one had no control but at the end of the day, I think its good to know that I still got really nice colleague (all within my level and only a few above) that I can work very well with. Its wrong to bitch about the injustice in front of them especially the junior. Not only it makes me look bad but at the same time it send a wrong signal to the junior peers that all is lost.

Recently a junior approaches me spilling his depression of discrimination by a certain higher being. He took 3 days MC but this higher being can only adopt a tunnel vision and conclude he is malingering. Junior, although a easily misunderstood person because of his character and behavior is someone who got good initiative and learn fast. Sometime higher being despite the elevated view of theirs failed to see the valued contribution of man on the ground. Somehow the higher being likes to look up with a higher purpose ( apparently our slogan) to snatch some prestigious accolades and award for some crappy contraption that is flawed and oversell. This characteristic only serve to built yet another rocky foundation that see people falling apart one by one due to morale issue.

I don't know why, I wish I could fucking curse and swear and hit a punching bag but thats very unbecoming of me. Walking back to the office with a heavy head, I saw a black guitar bag and in it was a white acoustic guitar. Coincidently someone printed out some guitar chords tutorial and left it on the table. I sat down the whole evening trying to play Oasis Wonderwall and Cranberries Zombie but ended up with random notes here and there. Its therpeutic. Later I met my juniors along the way back and learn that 3 of them brought the Guitar with their own money for the section. They are really nice and what an excellent morale boosting instrument to have in our section. Unlike the big shots WALIing (Walking Around Looking Important) who had struck down us hard by giving us a deadline to get rid of the refrigerator and beautiful fish tank in our section. Fucking idiots... don't they realize that this are the only few morale boosting supplements around? The cold soft drinks to quench our thirst and perk us up after a day of hard labor and the serenity of little fishes swimming around waiting to be fed.

Sometimes younger people can be more empathetic than older ones.